Taking care of an aging loved one can be stressful, especially if you live far away. Juggling work and family responsibilities while being a long-distance caregiver is a tough act, so here are a couple of tips to make things go smoothly.

Communication is key

If you find yourself in the position of long-distance care-giver, staying in touch is vital to assess your loved one’s situation and what might be needed. Ask open-ended questions about how they’re feeling and ask about friends and hobbies to get an idea of how active they are. Remember to ask if they need help with anything specific.

While phone calls go a long way, scheduling video calls if possible will help you pick up on body language and facial expressions which can sometimes be more telling than what the person is actually saying.

Create a support network

There are many tasks you can take care of from far away, like ordering prescriptions, but you need a team on the ground to help with daily tasks and to check on your loved one when you can’t. A local support network can consist of in-home caregivers, local friends, family or friendly neighbours.  

Create and maintain a shared calendar that shows who is providing what care and when they’re available, whether it’s grocery shopping, walking the dog, or just dropping in for a quick chat to make sure your loved one has everything they need. Make sure that everyone is aware of important health concerns, know how to reach you and have access to a spare key in case of emergency.

Take care of the admin

Make sure all legal, financial and medical documentation, like wills, policies, and insurance documents are updated and easily accessible. If your loved one doesn’t have a designated power of attorney, encourage them to appoint one to speak for them should they become unable to manage their own affairs.

The money talk might be tough, but you need to be aware of your loved one’s financial situation and plans for long-term care. Work with your loved one to manage finances and plan for future medical expenses as well as living costs and day-to-day spending. It’s important to make sure you have access to accounts in case you need to help pay the bills.

Stay informed

It’s important to stay informed about your loved one’s health and needs. Get written permission or ask them to make arrangements to allow you to speak to their doctors about health care concerns and plans, and set up regular calls with your loved one’s health care team to stay informed of any changes.

Visit regularly

It’s important to visit your loved one in person as often as possible to see how they are coping. This will tell you how they are doing and what they might need help with – piles of laundry or dirty dishes might indicate that it’s time for a weekly cleaning service.

Before arriving, ask your loved one if there’s anything specific they need help with or would like to do. If possible, schedule doctor’s visits or important appointments while you’re there so you can provide support or assistance and find any paperwork that still needs to be updated and filed.

While there might be a lot to do when you visit, make sure that the visit isn’t only about the practicalities of care – spend some quality time together doing something you both enjoy.

Conclusion

Long-distance caregiving can be challenging, but it’s not impossible. As your loved one’s situation changes, your plan will need to adjust accordingly, but with open communication and a good support network in place, the battle is halfway won.